Convincing Loved Ones To Make A Lifestyle Change

We all have that family member or loved one that lives a less-than-ideal lifestyle.

They eat terribly unhealthy, they do no exercise whatsoever and do very little movement throughout their day-to-day life. There are so many things that they could do (should be doing!) to improve their overall quality of life, which you try to constantly tell them... but to no result and you usually are snubbed off, right?

What I have learn't in my own life through trying to illiterate the importance of taking care of your health to family members and friends that would really benefit from making some lifestyle changes, is that they really just don't want to hear it! They either nod and listen and take everything in that you've said as a just a rant or just to let you feel like you've got whatever you needed to say off your chest (like, somehow it makes you feel better?) or they just dismiss you completely and treat you like you think you're some sort of high and mighty, fitness zealot know-it-all. This reaction, tends to be more common than not.. unfortunately.

Now unless you really are talking down to them or not trying to extend the right advice in an honest, genuine caring way (sometimes, there are the extremist out there!), it really makes you wonder why the ones we care about react in this particular way. Is it because they are in denial? is it because they think you have no idea what you're talking about?

Usually, more often than not it tends to be that this person is actually quite aware that their current lifestyle or health state are not ideal or needs some major improvement, but are just not ready to make that change yet, or they are; but it's just easier to push it away and pretend the problem doesn't exist. Sometimes, they actually may want to make this change and want to do it now, but every response that comes out of them is almost involuntary and due to just years of a negative relationship with health & fitness.. almost like their mind is just wired to treat health & fitness modalities as a threat.

What I have learned to understand is that just leading by example and being someone that they can look at and mirror does a much better job of convincing someone to make changes themselves than any amount of words could ever do. If they see you taking care of yourself and they see how you move, how you feel, how you can do certain things without hurting yourself, how much energy you have etc. this direct display of the benefits right in front of them, has such an impact on how they perceive the importance of taking care of yourself properly, eating right and excising regularly. This is by far, the best way to reach the people you care about and to start making the "gears turn" in their own minds and putting together the pieces, which ultimately will result in them starting to make some changes. Whether it's a small change like adding some vegetables into their diet, getting off the couch and going for a walk once a day, or even going as far as hiring a personal trainer to assist with improving their diet and getting a workout plan put together... the fact that they are starting to realize that this change is a necessity and now that they are actually making some changes... you have done your job by setting the example for them!

I understand that this can be an extremely difficult thing to do, especially when you care so much and don't want to see anything happen to them because of their current lifestyle; but ultimately, being patient and being the example for them really is the best thing you can do. Eventually, they'll come around and just allowing them to come to this realization on their own tends to also allow them to create a healthy relationship with health & fitness, due it not feeling like a forced chore. They can build on everything on their own and at their own pace, which results in them feeling more comfortable, more stable and most of the time; more consistent over the long term.

Be there for them when they need you, but trust in the process and be the best example for them that you can be.